Last week I went to my 30-year business school reunion (How is that even possible?!) My time at Kellogg was one of the best chapters of my life, and it was amazing to reconnect with so many classmates.
One of the highlights was sitting in on a class with Professors Loran Nordgren and David Schonthal, co-authors of The Human Element: Overcoming the Resistance That Awaits New Ideas. They unpacked a powerful idea that’s especially relevant to leaders today:
“When we’re trying to get people to adopt something new, we focus too much on fuel—and not enough on friction.”
In other words, we often assume that the best way to promote a new idea (e.g., getting people to come back to the office) is to add incentives: free lunch, paid parking, happy hours, etc.
That’s the fuel.
But it turns out that what’s often stopping people from embracing change isn’t a lack of fuel. It’s friction. And friction, Nordgren and Schonthal say, often goes unseen.
So my big question was: what is the friction for returning to the office? I know from talking to leaders every day that the fuel is definitely not working! Nordgren and Schonthal shared that the friction is the perceived loss of autonomy.
People got used to having more control over their day, whether that meant walking the dog, taking a child to school, or squeezing in a midday workout. And they’re resisting (strongly!) giving that up.
Like many leaders, I was overly focused on the fuel and not on the friction.
So what can Great Human Leaders do?
In their book, Nordgren and Schonthal offer five strategies for reducing friction and helping employees return to the office in a way that works for everyone:
- Acknowledge the friction. Normalize that change feels uncomfortable, and share that you’re navigating it, too. In other words, be vulnerable.
- Seed ideas early. People resist surprises. Introduce changes gradually, through regular conversations and communications. Let new ideas become familiar before you ask for commitment.
- Invite input. Co-designing doesn’t mean consensus from 50,000 people. Thank goodness! Identify a diverse group to offer feedback.
- Frame it as an experiment. People are more open to change when it feels temporary and revisable. Revisit, refine, repeat.
- Name your constraints. Be clear about the business needs. When people know what’s on the table (and what’s not), they’re more likely to engage meaningfully.
In a world that’s constantly changing, great human leaders know that the way new ideas are introduced matters as much as the ideas themselves.
So before you add more fuel to the RTO fire (or any workplace fire!) pause and follow the advice of Loran Nordgren and David Schonthal, and ask: What’s the friction I need to remove?
5/13/25
